Life is a web

One thing I've come to realize since I started thinking about this wedding (rather than, say, daydreaming about it), is that everything depends on everything else. And that makes things difficult.

Say, for instance, that you're trying to start planning a wedding (hypothetically, of course). Well, there are lots of places you could start, right? Color scheme (fun!), general location, actual venues, general timing (what season?), and so on. Except that as soon as you start to take one of these options and run with it, you soon discover yourself confronted with most of the other questions you thought you left behind.

As soon as you start to think of actual places that would be fun to get married in, for instance, you've got to think of where they generally are. It would be great to get married in the church I grew up in, and Toad's in New Haven would make a rocking reception location (ha. ha.) but they don't make much sense together. Even something fun and fluffy like thinking about color schemes gets all caught up in what season you'll get married in (and on to other things), at least according to general wisdom.

So where on earth do you start?

After a lot of pondering during the walks to and from work (and the occasional lab meeting), I decided to pick a season and/or general time of year first. Not only is my timing greatly constrained by my and all my friends' academic calendars, but it also has bearing on which part of the country we'd go for: flying in and out of Western PA or Boston in the winter or even early spring is asking for trouble, whereas Indiana is supposedly abysmally hot and humid in the summer. And, on one particularly miserable day this June, I decided that a summer wedding was out of the question. If one's out, it made sense to start with this already reduced category for initial planning.

All right then. I love the fall, but it'll be pretty much constant coursework. Fall breaks, if people have them, don't line up and the last thing I want is to have to study for a midterm on my wedding day. Winter is also awesome, but travel can be tough to predict. Do-able, but I'd be risking disaster. Spring is similar to winter travel-wise, at least in 2/3 locations, and also has the downside of classes and so on. I was stymied.

But then, in a flash of brilliance, I realized that IU finishes their classes ridiculously early - finals are over in the first week in May. What about mid-May...? Weather? Check! - It's unlikely to be sweltering, but it probably won't snow either. School? Check! - I'll have been out long enough to make some last-minute preparations but not so long that I'd have to be starting summer research yet. Location? Check! - Bloomington, Boston and Clarion would all theoretically be fine, although IN might be a bit greener. As an added bonus, it'd be just about a year from when we got engaged, which is both unhurried and plenty of time to plan (I say this now. Quote me in March).

As for when in May, I've been thinking of Memorial Day weekend because both academics and real-world types would probably have a long weekend and therefore be able to do some traveling. Also, it's early in 2009, coming on the 25th, so chances of ice cream cake-melting heat waves aren't too high. So is a May 24th wedding in my future? Perhaps unsurprisingly, it depends. On such a busy weekend, are venues still available? (watch for an upcoming rant on how ridiculously far in advance you need to plan things)